Literally Who Are These Custom Mr. Peanut Sneakers For?

Keep your wits about you, Dunkin' Donuts sneakers, because there's a new food-themed collab in the mix, and this one comes courtesy of one Monsieur Peanut. That's right, America's creepiest peanut spokesman has his very own sneaker line, eloquently titled "Crunch Force 1."

Brought to life by artists Jeff Cole, Seth Fowler and sneaker manufacturer Rich Franklin, the sneakers feature "premium leather, Mr. Peanut shoe tongue, and peanut insole," perfect for the hypebeast with no discernible peanut allergy.

Even after watching the weirdly beautifully-produced Crunch Force 1 video, the question remains: who the hell is actually going to buy these shoes? We've put together a list of prospective buyers below, but feel free to @ us if we missed any.

Confused Europeans. These sneakers have a retro-adjacent-but-not-quite vibe that just screams "sunburned Germans waiting in line outside the Supreme store."

Wall Street freaks. Those guys will wear anything.

The twins from The Parent Trap. Remember Annie and Hallie's iconic bonding scene over peanut butter Oreos? "I just made up [peanut butter and Oreos] for no reason other than it sounded weird and some cute kid would do it," tha god Nancy Meyers told Refinery29, unaware that she would spark a culinary revolution.

Your crotchety North Carolinan grandpa. We're assuming the intended audience for these sneakers is "urban tastemakers," not the elderly, but there's nothing old folks love more than a giant tub of dusty Planters peanuts—so much so that they might just be willing to rep the brand.

The deeply-online community. We love a niche sneak for ironic Instagramming!

Hardcore Jimmy Carter stans. Yes, our 39th president owned a peanut farm, any questions? He turned the farm over to a blind trust before taking office—because that's what presidents did once upon a time—and these sneakers allow you to appreciate his diligence.